3 lessons female advisers can learn from Lauren Bacall

Hollywood legend Lauren Bacall died last week at age 89. When I heard the news, I took a moment to remember her work on the screen, her life behind the scenes and how she had a profound impact on me as a young girl.
I first heard about Lauren Bacall by watching the classic movie “To Have and Have Not.” She co-starred with the love of her life, Humphrey Bogart. But what really impressed me was a book she wrote that I read when I was 12 years old. It was about her experience meeting Mr. Bogart and falling in love. It also highlighted her strong will, fierce determination and desire to be in a relationship defined by more than a man. She was the first truly powerful woman I had ever encountered. As a young teen, I wanted to emulate her.
I never met Ms. Bacall and didn’t follow her later in her career. But I did learn some important lessons from her that have made me successful in the business world. Here are three lessons that can empower you too:

1. Use your voice. Ms. Bacall had a wonderfully raspy voice. By all accounts, she used it often and maintained a clear point of view. While some may label this trait in a woman as “opinionated,” it really is what all women need to do to get noticed and stand out in business. If you don’t speak up, have an opinion and take a risk in sharing it, the chances of getting promoted into the C-suite or effecting change are slim.
2. Don’t define yourself by one role. In an interview last Tuesday, Tom Brokaw, a personal friend of Ms. Bacall, mentioned how she struggled to get others to define her as more than the wife of Mr. Bogart. She wanted to be known as more than one-dimensional person who once was married to a Hollywood heartthrob. As women, we struggle to find time to be a wife, caregiver, friend, sister, daughter and professional. Similar to Ms. Bacall, it’s important to embrace all the aspects of who you are as a woman. This will make you more effective at work and provide a great role model for the women climbing the ladder behind you.
3. Be disruptive. Every time Ms. Bacall walked on screen, she caused a stir. She had presence and grace; she made you take notice. To be effective in creating change in an industry, it’s important to step outside your comfort zone, take risks and be disruptive from time to time. Otherwise, things will just stay the same.

In a funny way, I will miss Lauren Bacall. She was a realist who was quoted as saying, “Here is a test to find out whether your mission in life is complete. If you’re alive, it isn’t.” So I will carry on the mission without her.
Kathleen Burns Kingsbury is a wealth psychology expert, founder of KBK Wealth Connection and the author of several books including “How to Give Financial Advice to Women” and “How to Give Financial Advice to Couples.”